Among my friends in Seattle, it's essential for every person to have a secret hip hop identity, a name to wear for a cool ride on a dark evening. Staci "the Machine." "T-Diddy" Ted.
Me? I'm Jon.a.thang.
If a man's home is his kingdom, I'm just a usurper. I rent my apartment. That means that I don't even have an ultimate right to the throne in my bathroom. I live my life on the mean streets of the middle class. Yeah, my ride's got a sub, a silver sheen, and tinted windows, but the rubber panels mean the Element ain't no Caddy. And in Ballard, you got no Caddy, you got no respect.
But today, things have changed for the .thang.
Oh yeah, baby. Enameled bone just don't suit me no more. Ceramics? Man, ceramics is for pottery class. Me? I don't gots to go to class. I is class. I's precious, and my oral health be precious to me an' all the homies what lovin' the .thang.
So baby, today – today, baby, Jon.a.thang finally got him some bling. And not just some kiddie bling, no. I got me gold. I got me a crown. I got me a gold crown.
Last molar. Uppah right.
Oh yeah. You show me the money, baby, and maybe – just maybe – I show you the bling.
I got me a crown. I say that makes me a king. King even if I don't own my own throne.
Posted by jonhanneman at November 28, 2007 7:38 PM | TrackBackKeep up the good work, Jon.a.thang
Posted by: Larry P at November 29, 2007 7:50 PMDude. You on something??? ;oP
Posted by: Danna at December 10, 2007 8:34 PM(This comment wouldn't post to the previous entry.)
I'll eat the mint & licorice for ya! Kay, & I let my daughter watch your "hilarious" clip, so yeah . . . um, you get to explain to her why it's not going to be a night of nightmares she gets to go to bed now. Lovely, Jon. Ppppbbbttt.