I have a class on Tuesday mornings that I call my "horror class." I think we've had one week together this semester where I didn't have to yell (and most of the time that's a literal yell) at them for misbehaving. Today was no exception.
I suppose part of the trouble is my attitude going in. Calling them the "horror class" doesn't exactly set me off on the right foot. Today I really blew up at them. I feel bad about it, but I don't know what to do. When you have to shut multiple computers per class period (normally the same students from week to week) and take away students' mobile phones because they're text messaging, your patience wears less than thin. We have only one period left together before the final exam. Part of me is thankful that it's almost over. Part of me is dreading that last period. And part of me is upset and disappointed with myself because their misbehavior bothers me so much and I end up being a bad example.
I'm frustrated with them. I'm frustrated with me because I get angry with them. I'm frustrated with several other areas in my life.
"When I Look At The World"
When you look at the world
What is it that you see
People find all kinds of things
That bring them to their knees
I see an expression
So clear and so true
That changes the atmosphere
When you walk into the room
So I try to be like you
Try to feel it like you do
But without you it's no use
I can't see what you see
When I look at the world
When the night is someone else's
And you're trying to get some sleep
When your thoughts are too expensive
To ever want to keep
When there's all kinds of chaos
And everyone is walking lame
You don't even blink now do you
Don't even look away
So I try to be like you
Try to feel it like you do
But without you it's no use
I can't see what you see
When I look at the world
I can't wait any longer
I can't wait 'til I'm stronger
Can't wait any longer
To see what you see
When I look at the world
I'm in the waiting room
I can't see for the smoke
I think of you and your holy book
When the rest of us choke
Tell me, tell me
What do you see
Tell me, tell me
What's wrong with me
--Bono
Posted by at May 18, 2004 6:13 PM